Never travelled in a Mumbai local? You have missed something in life! Let me educate you a bit with this post:-)
First thing's first,in Mumbai Local trains are meant for everyone,be it masses or the classes.Initially,you might feel awkward having a C-Segment car at home and an Corporate tag in your job,to be travelling in a train.But soon you will realize that people having bigger better cars,houses and designation also travel by the Mumbai Local.The reason is simple - "Save Time".The Mumbai Road infrastructure is below pathetic status,and nothing much is happening to improve it.That is why,taking a train is always a better bet.
The first thing that strikes you even when at the ticket counter is the variety of people around you.An old uncle telling people from behind not to shove,a street hudlum with Sanju Baba's hairstyle and Sunil Shetty's biceps chews gum and eyes the nearby girls,aunties and whatever he fancies,a busy salesman with a black briefcase wipes sweat from his forehead after probably completing his third call of the day and going for his last.
I took the ticket from Kurla station and went to platform number 7.I waited for the train(Fast or Slow,I dont know) and the punctuality of the arrival surprised me.Bang on time! Now hold on,theres something very interesting that I have learnt during this Mumbai sojourn - getting up and down a mumbai local train is an art as well as science.While going up,art is prominent...as you hang on to your things(wallets,laptops,Clothes,Balls etc etc) and get up.While getting down,its more newton's law of inertia - You will be set in motion,so go with the flow and friction with the flow will slow you down once on the platform.
I must also say that the people within the local trains are most wonderful that I have seen. I was almost handholded during my ride from Kurla to Juinagar once inside the train,by an old frail man(A spare parts businessman in Panvel),who said that seeing me go on a call,reminded him of his son,who was also into sales.He asked me how much I earn - 5000 or 10000 :-),and I just smiled and told him 10000(The same amount that his son gets,obviously to make him happy).Even while coming back from Juinagar to Kurla at peak hour,I was guided by various people,each one with sweat on their foreheads and a smile on their lips.
In my whole journey of two days,that's what I noticed the most - the ability to smile inspite of the city gobbling up time and energies.I met an Autowallah on my way to the hotel in Andheri,who had been driving an Auto for 25 years.A staunch Shiv sena supporter,he told me in the half an hour journey how the city has changed for the good,how mumbai gets into the blood of every person who vists it once.
I am not in love with Mumbai as a city. I find it crowded,roads unplanned and humid.What negates all that though is the bundle of energy the city holds,as if a Nuclear Fusion reaction is happening within it.
This blogpost is not only to mention the advantages of travelling by Mumbai Local Train,but rather to talk about the string of strange characters I met everyday,when I was on it.Before I start though,some useful tips for outsiders who would soon need to travel by train.
Tip # 1 : In case your office starts at 10 AM,do not take the 9 AM train,because you will be CRUSHED.Do not take me lightly,because I somehow managed a ride once at 9 AM and almost lost my laptop,glasses,balls...well...almost!Please wake up a little early and take the train before 8 AM.You will still not get a place to sit till Dadar,but you will not get crushed and thrown around.
Tip # 2 : Take a little pain and find out the starting train from your region as you will always get a place to sit in a starting train.Also,buy a first class pass(Photograph needed) for the month.These acts will not ensure you guaranteed seating on every ride,but will make train commuting slightly easier.
But nothing can beat the weird/lovable/irritating/crazy characters that you will meet in the Mumbai Locals.Here's a small effort by me to capture some of these characters through this post:
Reliance CDMA Raju Bhai : Raju is from UP,and after staying in Mumbai for donkey years,has become bhai instead of bhaiya.He goes from Malad to Dadar to work as a packer and mover at some logistic company.Raju's favourite possession is his CDMA Mobile phone,which has a creaky and annoyingly loud speaker.The moment he climbs up on the train,he puts on these unbearable (Bhojpuri/Hindi songs from B grade Mithun movies) numbers for the rest of the journey.
Balancing Act Uncles : These nice local uncles are old and have probably been taking the locals for over 20 years.They stand within the train among the maddening crowd and read a "Loksatta" or a "Sakal" nonchalantly.Though it sounds easy,but reading is not child's play in a local train that halt,move and speed up everytime with a jolt.These uncles are also very helpful,and are always ready to tell you the simplest train route in case you ask them.
Bombay Bully Boys : Ok...these guys are poor replicas of a Sanjay Dutt or Sunil Shetty.Even if the train is empty,they will hang from the train,even if people are getting ready to get down in a civilized way,they will growl up in a hoarse voice : "abey,uttar na...kya jhol macha rakha hai"(Hey,get down...why all this commotion?).Their attitude is completely like that of a movie star in an action sequence,always ready to pounce...at whom...only they know!
The Madmen: These characters are the saddest ones to watch in the Mumbai locals.These are people who have lost their sanity in the Mumbai madness.They sit in the train,their eyes look blank and they have hardly have any destination to go.They look at you and smile,but the next moment their eyes become moist...thinking about the state they are in!
The Jolly Salesman: You are travelling in the crowded compartment,when you hear a loud,jolly voice..."Gentlemen,you have ulcer,piles,constipation,rashes...say goodbye to them all.With this book written in Hindi,Marathi,Gujarati, you will get remedies for 300 diseases.10 Rs only.No charges for looking".The dialogues are told with such conviction and confidence,that the average 2nd class crowd soon plucks up all the copies and the jolly salesman has a field day:-).I think corporate business developement people(me included) should learn something from these guys.
There are many more such characters and I would keep on writing if I can.For example,a Qawwal group kept singing from Churchgate to Malad,a young boy who got separated from his father at Dadar was helped by the local train commuters and handed over to the police.
All in all,Mumbai locals are a mix of sweat,humanity,hope...all mixed together in a strange smelly paste - called "Daily Rigmarole"
